Top Ten Reasons the Dispensationalist Did Not Cross the Road
10. Thought he would be raptured before he got there anyway.
9. Thought that the other side was for the ‘Israel’, and this side was for the ‘church’.
8. Charles Ryrie was still on this side of the road, why cross?
7. Thought it was pointless since Jesus was just going to bring him back after 7 years.
6. Like the OT prophets and the church age, he was unable to see the other side.
5. He was afraid that if he went, there would be nothing to restrain the man of lawlessness.
4. He was not a part of the dispensation of ‘crossing’.
3. Dallas Theological Seminary hadn’t yet published anything telling him how to do it.
2. Thought there was a two thousand foot gap between the 69th and 70th step.
1. By taking a consistently literal approach, he thought that ‘cross the road’ meant something about the crucifixion.
This can't-miss Top Ten is from the keyboard of C. Michael Patton. For more hermeneutic-humor, check out Michael's Top Ten Reasons the Emerger Did Not Cross the Road, and The Top Ten Reasons the Reformed Theologian Did Not Cross the Road.
Perhaps it's apparent that Michael is a progressive dispensationalist!
Labels: C Michael Patton, dispensationalism, Hermeneutic Humor, Top Ten
posted by Ken Fields at 12:01 AM
4 Comments:
Thanks for the laugh!
JZ
Why on earth would we want to make fun of a literal/historical/grammatical interpretation of Scripture? Not taking hermeneutics seriously is no laughing matter. Wouldn't you agree?
After reading #1, I came to the conclusion that perhaps Mr. Patton and his allies on this blog can't distinquish between literalism and letterism.
tjp
This is a really great top ten list, #3 was my favorite. You can post this to our site http://www.toptentopten.com/ and then link back to your site. We are looking for top ten lists and our users can track back to your site. The coolest feature is you can let other people vote on the rankings of your list.
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